Need

Logically, I know and understand that all things have a need. In fact, the reality is that all things generally have more than one. So why is accepting our needs seemingly so difficult?

You know, part of me thinks that the better you are at enunciating your needs the more likely you are to have a successful relationship. And by relationship, I do not mean purely the intimate sort. Rather, I think that that if you are able to speak clearly about your needs, all your interpersonal relationships will be better off.

Why is that we cannot see our own needs evolving, changing or morphing? It's almost like we feel like we are static beings held fast in a timeless moment. As if I will not or cannot change. If I can change, so can my needs.

I used to think that there was a perfect set of needs. A set of needs that were minimal and that only the most perfectly mentally healthy person could survive on that sparse set of requisite things. I am not that mentally healthy. (No shit rings out from the peanut gallery!)

I am a little older and a little wiser now. I am the best me I can be.. and that me needs.

I need order, structure and to feel the ability to let go of control. I need to follow. I need to be free from chaos. I need to not feel the need to take charge.

I need a simple life full of small pleasure and calm serenity. I need to admire the values, temperament and actions of my Master. I need to be proud of him.

I need to trust him. I need to feel small under his eye.

I need those things.

One thing I am sure of is that my needs later on life will most likely have changed slightly. I'm ok with that.